Monday, 27 January 2014

ON MY MIND | Making time for people we love.

Me (aged around 18mths+) and Mum.

Today's post is a little different from my layout shares and all things crafty. I am going to share a few little tidbits about myself...and what's on my mind right now. 

Not many of you will know this, but I developed a chronic health condition when I was 24. I will be 38 this year, and thankfully, I have experienced amazing physical healing in the past few years and I feel like a new person! 

This incredible journey I have been on has taught me so much. What stood out most was learning to live gently, intentionally and gratefully.

Being physically unwell and being a new mum was by far the biggest challenge I have ever faced. Physically, mentally and emotionally for both myself, and my husband. My condition worsened after childbirth.

During those years when the boys were just babies, I was consumed with my own physical discomfort, that I pushed everyone away. I was anxious, irritable, and basically a pain in the backside to be around. But through all this, my mum was always on stand by. Yes, mothers are a bit awesome like that.

I look back on those years and I remember mum ALWAYS doing things for me, yet never complaining or nagging. She would come over to help with the boys, and do things around the house when she finished work. She was just there for me, never showing her own heart ache as she watched me deal with my health. 

As a mother myself now, I truly appreciate what an amazingly strong woman mum is. She raised myself and my brother as a single parent for many years, having been abandoned by my biological father whilst she was pregnant with my brother. 

Which in a roundabout sort of way, brings me to what is currently on my mind. 

Towards the end of each year, I tend to do a bit of self reflection. Thinking about where I am heading, what I have achieved over the past year, what I would like to achieve in the coming year, what areas of my life I would like to make changes to, and what I want to make a priority.

With every passing year, as my babies (yes, they are 6 and 9!) grow up, I am getting older, and so is my mumma.

I am making it a priority this year to spend more time with my amazing mumma and to take the boys to visit her more often. She spoils them rotten, which is exactly the way it should be! The boys keep her young and make her very happy (and bring a little chaos too)

Mum is still working which I think is great! Not so much for the money, but so she can hang with her little crew and gossip no doubt. 

I have a habit of thinking about the future...a little too much. Sometimes, to my own detriment because it often morphs into worry.

I do not want to live with the regret of not having spent enough time with those I love. This is why it pains me to look back on those years of being unwell and feel the regret of not being present with the ones nearest and dearest to me. And this includes my babies -- which could well be the part that hurts the most. 

I want to take more photos OF mum, and photos WITH mum. It has occurred to me that I don't really have that many photos of mum and I. Not since I was quite young. Pfft! And I call myself a memory keeper!?! Things are about to change :)

I believe with all my heart, the most important thing is to tell those whom we love, that we love them. To never, EVER allow our love to be left unspoken or unknown.

Away with my lame excuses of being too busy, or having no time. I am going to MAKE time and make memories to treasure for a lifetime.   

4 comments:

  1. Look how alike you and Jake are as babies. I love your story Sue. I too am guilty of not having enough photos of me and my mumma - fixed that today though :)

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  2. I need more photos of and with my Mum too.
    Thank you for the reminder x

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  3. so nice to read. you are such a beautiful person Sue.. Make sure you start snapping away my friend ..... you are an inspiration in more ways than one xxx

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  4. I think this post is an inspiration to us all, to remember the why of what we are doing. A truly amazing post Sue xx

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