ON MY MIND: Learning and Nurturing

Hello! It's been a while!

Thank you dear readers, who continue to follow this 'lil blog of mine despite my lack of crafty shares lately.

I have had to take the pressure off myself to create and craft. The pressure to keep up. The pressure to seek approval.  

Over the past few months I have been focussed on things I trust will nurture my mind, body and soul.

---

SLEEP, YOGA AND MEDITATION

Test results show I have Adrenal Fatigue. In the past, it's not unusual for me to to stay up into the early hours of the morning and function (barely) on 4 - 5 hours sleep. Having these recent test results has reinforced I consistently need more quality sleep.

Part of the treatment is practicing yoga which I had been doing via Yoga with Adriene. I was half way into the 30-days of yoga challenge when the boys got viruses (week long fevers and terrible coughs) which coincided with the school holidays so everything went a little pear shaped. Regardless, I was surprised how much I loved the yoga and noticed less fogginess in my head and more mental clarity within just a few days. Adriene is also really fun to follow along with because she is so relaxed -- check out Day 1! I am keen to get back into it.

Another aspect of the treatment is progressive muscle relaxation which you can read more about here. I purchased the tracks by Joanne D'Amico here. I'm very particular with guided meditations because I needed to find a voice that didn't irritate me when I was trying to relax. Joanne's meditations are fantastic.

---

THE CONNECTION DOCUMENTARY

Due to a chronic health condition which spanned well over a decade from when I was 24 years old, I have researched, studied and become fascinated with the mind-body connection and how this holds the key to our ability to heal. 

I watched an amazing documentary last month called The Connection. After seeing the trailer, I purchased it immediately! You can purchase it online here.  

"It offers answers and proves that you can change your mind, 

change your health and change your life."  

~ The Connection

I cannot even tell you how much I loved this documentary. Do yourself a favour and at least check out the trailer. The Connection has reinforced why I need to slow down. 

---

BUILDING A STRONGER RELATIONSHIP WITH MY SON

I wrote about my relationship with Mr 11 here a few months ago. Building a stronger connection with my eldest has been my focus for a while now. With some minor social matters at school, it was even more important now for him to feel reassured and supported on the home front. 

We spent the day together, just the two of us, for his birthday last week. 

We went for donuts and birthday shopping which was all very awesome. However, that afternoon things quickly fell apart when he got uber frustrated with me (mid-Lego build) for taking too many photos, and him telling me I'd literally ruined his birthday. 

After I gave him some space, he came over and put his arms around me. Through his tears (and mine) he talked and I listened to him quietly. He told me how he felt about things I honestly had no idea about. We talked as equals, not just as mother and child. Something shifted that day and his behaviour and attitude has changed, for the better. My boy with the tough exterior is a sensitive kind hearted young man who needed to be heard and to hear he is loved and appreciated. Isn't that what we all want?

It takes a certain amount of emotional energy, but it's well worth it. 

---

THE LIFE-CHANGING MAGIC OF TIDYING

I have been overwhelmed in many areas of my life lately. My home workspace that was intended to be my creative haven is cluttered and piled with papers and stuff. Yesterday I sat down to write a list of all the things overwhelming me. I had a sizeable list and I realised most of the items were indeed "things to do". 

The reason I haven't started to work through my list of things to do is because I don't know where anything is! The thought of just looking for the paperwork I need is already too daunting. Last night I came across a book review on "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying" by Marie Kando and I knew I had to give this a go. 

I bought the book today and I can't wait to read it. Mr 11 has already started reading it which is cute. Tonight he asked for his own copy for school so he could read it instead of a library book. Bless him.

---

If you have read this far, thank you.

It's been a time of change, learning and nurturing as I look for ways to simplify and find balance in my life so I am calmer, happier and healthier. Not asking for much, right?

Hope you all have a beautiful week xo

PS. Project Life is still my core memory keeping method so watch this space. 

ON MY MIND | When your child says "I don't love you Mummy"

I take being a mum very seriously. I just want to be a good mother.

My relationship with my 10 year old has always been challenging. I blame myself for not being a "better mother" when he was a toddler. Granted I was dealing with my own health issues at the time, I still feel like I could have done more. Played with him more. Watched him more. Talked to him more. Read to him more. Argh! More available. More present.

When he was approaching 3 years old, I was pregnant with our second child and the shortfalls in our relationship started to show. But he's only 3 I hear you say! 

As a 30-year old woman, I behaved like a child who's heart had been crushed when her best friend tells her she has a new best friend.

My 3 year old did not mince his words when he said to me "I don't love you mummy. I love Daddy". It was always "No! I want Daddy, not you Mummy!" 

I was heartbroken. Defeated. Hurt. Did I mention heartbroken?

It took me a while to put my childish reactions aside and realise that I was looking at the definition of love from an adult's perspective, which is very different from my 3 year old's definition of love. 

To a 3 year old, love is having fun! And Daddy is FUN! He did all the cool fun stuff like bike riding, playing soccer, flying him around like Superman, playing cars, building train tracks, bush walks...FUN boy stuff.

My parents separated when I was 5 years old. I don't have a relationship with my father so I can honestly say, I love my mum more. I have grown up not being able to understand how a child can love both parents equally. 

I had an epiphany one evening during a conversation with my husband about his relationship with his parents. At first I could not get my head around how you could love both parents the same. It was not something I had ever experienced. Sounds strange doesn't it?

As we talked it finally clicked and I realised the way my husband loves his parents was the way I loved my Grandparents. I loved them both equally but I loved them both differently, each for who they were. I connected with Grandma differently from my Grandfather, but the love was the same. 

Fast forward to today, and my relationship with my eldest child is still hard work. As I said at the beginning, I take my role as a mother very seriously. This means I am always reassessing how I handle situations, especially ones with the boys, and I look at whether I need to do anything differently, or better next time. 

My son is stubborn. He is reserved and withdrawn. He won't laugh at my bad mum jokes. He challenges what I say. And he pushes my patience to the max. But he has a kind heart, and he wants to know he is loved and to be heard.

Last year, I decided it was time to work on actively building a stronger relationship and connection with my son. It had been easier to let it go and pretend everything was okay. 

It is interesting how when you are ready and open to make a change, the universe will provide you with the resources to guide you in the right direction.

My boss gave me a parenting booklet from Hand in Hand to read. It goes into the importance of dedicated one-on-one time with each child and letting them guide the play/activity and conversation. This tells your child you are there just for them. I also started to come across a lot of blog posts about how LISTENING to your child is vital to better behaviour and improving parent-child relationships. 

It seems obvious now, but I was consumed by my list of to-do's that I started to confused my priorities. To build a stronger relationship with Mr 10, I needed to listen with love. Listen with an open heart. I need to listen to him, and not just hear him. 

I feel like I'm putting myself out there as a bad mother by even admitting to that.

We had a great conversation last night when I was saying goodnight to him at bedtime. He opened up about how he held back from telling me things because he thought I wouldn't be interested. I told him that I want to know EVERYTHING about his day because I miss out on 6 hours of his day when he is at school! I want details. 

I could see his eyes soften, and the tone in his voice said he was ready to share. I listened as he told me this crazy story about school which had us both in hysterics. It's been a while since we laughed together like that. I want to create more of these moments with him. 

ON MY MIND | Keeping journals for my family.

I found this cute little card sitting on my keyboard Monday morning after I dropped the kids to school and ready to start my workday. I was blown away that my husband handmade and illustrated a card for me. 

Of course the tear jerker was the sweet message inside. It's nice to be told you are loved, appreciated and to know that someone notices you for all that you are and do. 

Which brings me to the journals I started as of 1 January this year, for the boys, my husband, and a gratitude journal for myself. 

Journals from kikki k stamped with personalised stamps from Kellie Stamps.

I was inspired by this blog post by Becky Higgins. 

I wanted to do more than my pocket page albums this year, and have more daily awareness and appreciation of the amazingness of my boys AND my husband. I want to have more awareness and appreciation of the amazingness of MY every day.

I document so much about the boys that I sometimes put my husband and myself last. This year I'm making changes with the journals and having an album just for me, here. 

I have no rules about how often or how much I write in our journals. I write when I feel like it, which has generally been at least a few times a week. No pressure. 

It has been less that two months into the year and reading back on previous entries is really awesome. When the boys read their journals, their smiles tell me they feel proud of themselves and happy I notice what they do.

Also, when it comes to my monthly Project Life albums, I already have stories recorded in the journals to jog my memory! 

The other thing is when the boys read the things I appreciate about them, I hope it will pave the way for them to learn how to practice gratitude for the positives in their day as well. 

My youngest may be starting to learn gratitude already. Here's a recent entry I wrote in his journal:

"You told me today was 'the best day ever'. I love your joy for all the wonderful things in your day. Without even being consciously aware of it, you practice gratitude like a pro. Your reasons for it being such an awesome day include: having casserole for lunch. Having swimming AND moving up a level. You were always a turtle and now you are a fish! I watched as you swam so beautifully like never before. I was bursting with pride. And then I made chicken rice paper rolls for your afternoon snack before Taekwondo which you said you LOVE more than casserole! And then at TKD you earned all the stripes that were being given today. You really did have an amazing day and I am so proud of you."


I have always loved this quote from the movie Shall We Dance (2004), and have shared it before:

"Your life will not go unnoticed,

 because I will notice it.

Your life will not go un-witnessed,

because I will be your witness"

The above quote sums up why I use Project Life. It is why I am passionate about memory keeping. It's why I am keeping these journals for my family. I want them to know that I notice them. 

It's so easy to simply exist. I believe memory keeping, in all it's wondrous forms, helps us live more intentionally. And I love that. 

ON MY MIND | Remembering my Grandfather.

She was 5 years old. Like any other school day, her father drove her to school. "Remember to come pick me up okay Daddy. And don't be late," she told him.

Her father then drove the family car to their local mechanic, leaving a handwritten letter on the dash for his wife. Her father told the mechanic to phone his wife and ask her to pick up the car.

His wife was pregnant with their second child. The letter from the little girl's father said he was leaving and to not try to find him as he would not be coming home. The little girl's mother and grandparents went to pick her up from school. "Where's Daddy?" she asked. "He's run away. We don't know where he has gone," her mother told her as she fought back tears of her own. 

The little girl went home that afternoon and looked at the last gift from father. A pen holder that was still sitting on her small table. She looked around the house confused about what had just happened -- unaware their lives were about to change.

My Grandfather and I.

That little girl was me. I remember this story on the 3rd anniversary of my Grandfather's passing. I did not have a father growing up. Not in the traditional sense. I had my Grandfather. He was a father and Grandfather in one, and today I missed him very much.

Grandad used to walk me home to their house after pre-school. He would carry my boxy green port, and often have to pick me up as well whenever I saw a dog come close (i.e. 10 metres away lol). 

We would often play card games such as Snap. And I'm certain he knew I had rigged the game by organising the cards so I would win. Everytime. 

And Grandad would watch my favourite tv show, Monkey Magic with me after dinner. And then Grandma would treat me to Arnott's Gingernut biscuits, Scotch Fingers or Monte Carlos before bed. 

Grandad taught me how to make my bed. How to iron my school uniform. How to polish my school shoes. How to fold my clothes so that were perfectly neat. And how to cook a curry, fried rice and omelette -- Chinese style. 

On our school holidays, Grandma and Grandad took my brother and I on the council bus to McDonald's where Grandad always ordered the Fillet-O-Fish -- no cheese, and no gherkin. And afterwards we would buy half a dozen cream buns, cream donuts and finger buns to take home. 

My childhood memories are mostly of my Grandparents because as a single parent, my mother worked long hours to support my brother and I. 

We were a very close family. My world was shattered when my Grandmother fell terminally ill. I was 21 by then.

I moved into their home so I could be there to support Grandad as he cared for Grandma, and so I could spend as much time as possible with my Grandmother. Her and I had a very close bond and I loved her as I did my own mother. 

Grandad had been so strong throughout her entire illness. But on the morning of Grandma's funeral, he broke down and wept for his wife whom he had be married to for 56 years. 

Who I am today has been greatly influenced by these two beautiful people who raised me to know what it means to be loved. I am so very lucky.   

Today I went with my mum and family to the buddhist temple and burnt incense in memory of Grandad. And for Grandma. Miss them both very much.

ON MY MIND | It's the good old "mum-guilt" trick.

I am kind. I am considerate. I am thoughtful. I am loving. I know I am all these things yet after I tucked my eldest into bed tonight, I retreated into the bathroom, closed the door, sat down on the side of the bathtub and had a little cry. Mum-guilt had reared it's ugly head again.

I had a trying night where my eldest was testing my patience. Don't get me wrong, he's a really good kid, but he is head strong and stubborn, much like me. 

Everyday I go through the motions of a being a "good mother". 

I make school lunches. I drive them to appointments before and after school. I spend my weekends cooking and baking. I do the laundry, clean the house and I vacuum the car. I fold the clothes and cook homemade dinners every night. I tuck them in every night and tell them how much I love them.

I know I am a good mother in what I do for my children.

And yet I feel like an inadequate mother every day. 

My eldest boy torments (in the nicest brotherly way possible) his younger brother incessantly, as older siblings often do. It drives me batty. 

His defence is "I was just having fun with him" or "I was just playing with him..." or "I was just trying to make him laugh.." 

What do I say to that? I honestly don't know. We have the same conversation every other day, and I am no closer to finding a solution to what to say to him, or what to do. I see where he is coming from, he's just being a kid.

I rouse at them. Neither pays me any attention until I get cranky. Then I separate them and send them to their rooms because it gives me space to calm down and process my thoughts. 

This is when the feelings of the inadequacy of my parenting skills kicks in. I am feeling the mum-guilt. Self doubt. Wondering "Am I a good enough mother?" 

I try to explain how their actions are wrong. Inconsiderate. Disrespectful. In doing so, I am making them feel guilty. I tell them I I am disappointed with their actions. And that what they are doing is not acceptable behaviour. 

I realised that I was unknowingly instilling in my children the negative thoughts I have about myself. All the things I personally struggle with. Which is why I was so upset tonight. 

I know how terrible it feels to feel like you have disappointed someone you love. How guilt eats you up from inside. And how hard it is to shake that feeling that you are not good enough as a person.

I told my eldest tonight that sometimes I don't know if I am doing a good job being a mother. And that I don't have instructions on what to do. To which he replied, "Does Daddy have some instructions?" Bless his little cotton socks, I wish he did. It would make things a lot easier. 

I don't have any answers. But I do know I don't want my children to think they are not good enough. I just have to keep working at it. 

ON MY MIND | Bad Day?

Having a bad day? Bad week? Could a different perspective and change of attitude help put new light on a situation? 

What started me thinking about this was when I had a few set backs that were seemingly out of my control over the past few weeks. And then a few more set backs rolled in. And I got a little bit cranky lol...but I wasn't that keen to put it down to just bad luck.  

Let's face it. Sh*t happens. Illness, financial difficulties, grief, disappointment, career challenges, unrequited love....you know what I'm talking about. 

I want to share a little about how my little boys react when they think their entire world is crashing down. And as adults, we react similarly, but in a more grown up way of course!

As an example, my youngest comes to me, stomps his feet with tears welling in those big brown eyes and says "Mummy, today is the worst day ever! It really really is!!" 

I tell him, "Today is not the worst day ever. Today ***insert a 6 year old's idea of disaster here*** happened. Anything happen today that was really really good?"

My little man had just experienced disappointment. Someone or something has built a wall between him and his dream. 

When he comes to me in utter devastation, I ask him:

- do you have mummy and daddy for cuddles?
- do you have food to eat? 

- do you have a house to live in?

- do you have a bed to sleep in?

- do you have toys to play with and books to read?

- are you healthy and well?

- do you have clothes to wear?

- so...is it really that bad?

I do my best to put things into perspective for him and highlight the things he has to be grateful for. More often than not, he snaps out of it quickly. 

When someone or something stands between us and our dreams, or stops us from our ideal way of living or being, it is a normal reaction to blame it on that mysterious thing known as "bad luck". But isn't it disempowering to leave our happiness up to chance?

We have a choice. Every single time. We have the CHOICE to accept a situation and be at peace with it, OR we have the CHOICE to look for ways to change the situation. And sometimes, we need to do both. How awesome to be in control of our own happiness again!?!

My eldest son took a different approach when he was younger. 

He would throw monster tantrums. I'm not talking about "terrible two's" tantrums. These were major 5 year old tantrums. In between tears and screaming, he would say, "Arghhhh! It's all your fault! You made me **insert any of the following: angry...smudge my drawing...break my toy...drop my apple..etc etc**!!!"

Not good, right? We wanted him to learn not to give his power away so easily. What I mean is, when he says it's our fault he is angry, he has given away his ability to control his own emotions to someone else...to us. 

Not only that, he renounced responsibility for his own actions and feelings i.e. blame.

When we take responsibility for our lives, we reclaim the power to make our lives what we want it to be. We reclaim the power to make dreams into reality. We reclaim the power to be at peace and happy!   

From an outsiders point of view, other people's lives may "appear" better or easier than our own. But what we don't know is the people whom we work with, walk with, wait with, may have just lost a loved one, is fighting for wellness, is desperate to conceive a child, left an abusive relationship, or has just been turned down for yet another job.

We all have our own unique story and our future is yet to be written. We cannot compare hardships. Nor can we compare successes. 

Perhaps the way we perceive a situation, our attitude towards it, and how we choose to react and feel is the key to how much we enjoy the life we have been gifted with. 

Here are two of my favourite quotes that I have made into 3x4 printables, free for you to download. Enjoy. xx

Download.

Download.

Download.

Download.

ON MY MIND | Making time for people we love.

Me (aged around 18mths+) and Mum.

Today's post is a little different from my layout shares and all things crafty. I am going to share a few little tidbits about myself...and what's on my mind right now. 

Not many of you will know this, but I developed a chronic health condition when I was 24. I will be 38 this year, and thankfully, I have experienced amazing physical healing in the past few years and I feel like a new person! 

This incredible journey I have been on has taught me so much. What stood out most was learning to live gently, intentionally and gratefully.

Being physically unwell and being a new mum was by far the biggest challenge I have ever faced. Physically, mentally and emotionally for both myself, and my husband. My condition worsened after childbirth.

During those years when the boys were just babies, I was consumed with my own physical discomfort, that I pushed everyone away. I was anxious, irritable, and basically a pain in the backside to be around. But through all this, my mum was always on stand by. Yes, mothers are a bit awesome like that.

I look back on those years and I remember mum ALWAYS doing things for me, yet never complaining or nagging. She would come over to help with the boys, and do things around the house when she finished work. She was just there for me, never showing her own heart ache as she watched me deal with my health. 

As a mother myself now, I truly appreciate what an amazingly strong woman mum is. She raised myself and my brother as a single parent for many years, having been abandoned by my biological father whilst she was pregnant with my brother. 

Which in a roundabout sort of way, brings me to what is currently on my mind. 

Towards the end of each year, I tend to do a bit of self reflection. Thinking about where I am heading, what I have achieved over the past year, what I would like to achieve in the coming year, what areas of my life I would like to make changes to, and what I want to make a priority.

With every passing year, as my babies (yes, they are 6 and 9!) grow up, I am getting older, and so is my mumma.

I am making it a priority this year to spend more time with my amazing mumma and to take the boys to visit her more often. She spoils them rotten, which is exactly the way it should be! The boys keep her young and make her very happy (and bring a little chaos too)

Mum is still working which I think is great! Not so much for the money, but so she can hang with her little crew and gossip no doubt. 

I have a habit of thinking about the future...a little too much. Sometimes, to my own detriment because it often morphs into worry.

I do not want to live with the regret of not having spent enough time with those I love. This is why it pains me to look back on those years of being unwell and feel the regret of not being present with the ones nearest and dearest to me. And this includes my babies -- which could well be the part that hurts the most. 

I want to take more photos OF mum, and photos WITH mum. It has occurred to me that I don't really have that many photos of mum and I. Not since I was quite young. Pfft! And I call myself a memory keeper!?! Things are about to change :)

I believe with all my heart, the most important thing is to tell those whom we love, that we love them. To never, EVER allow our love to be left unspoken or unknown.

Away with my lame excuses of being too busy, or having no time. I am going to MAKE time and make memories to treasure for a lifetime.   

ON MY MIND | What's the plan for 2014?

Hope you all had a lovely festive season! 

Our Christmas morning was a flurry of excitement with wrapping paper flying everywhere and a lot of woah's, cool and awesome's thrown around by two very happy little boys.

And then lunch and swim at my brother in law's place where hubby and his brothers competed to see who could fire the quickest and best sibling insult, and the boys and their cousins played and laughed. It made me realise how lucky I am to have such beautiful people in my life -- quick witted as well.

So there are only 5 more days until we see in 2014! 

I do not set goals specifically for a new year as I like the option to start them at anytime I am motivated to do so. (less pressure!)

Having said that, the closing of one year and the beginning of another always inspires me to assess where I am at, and where I would like to be heading.

Right now, my aim is quite simple. It is about making IMPROVEMENTS to the way I am currently doing things. 

This is what it comes down to:

1. Eat more regularly and stop skipping meals

2. Drink more water

3. Go to bed earlier

4. Be more present and patient with my little boys

5. Have more family time together

5. Visit my mum more often

6. Be more organised so that the boys are fed and get into bed earlier

There is nothing about work, money, holidays, Project Life or digital designing. That’s because the most important thing for now is to build good foundations and hopefully the rest will fall into place.

I most definitely have creative projects I have on the go, namely getting my boys’ photos into albums. But these are ongoing and I continue to chip away at it. And it’s something I love doing so I don’t need a reminder to get onto them!

I found this awesome quote on pinterest yesterday that I have added to a photo I took  last year at the Mt Cootha Botanical Gardens. This quote resonates with me so much that I will be pinning it on my PHYSCIAL WALL in my craft room.

What is on your radar at the moment for change or improvement? Do you make New Year's resolutions?

ON MY MIND | Our amazing school teachers

There are only two weeks of school left for the boys. Where has the year gone!?!

Little Jake has almost finished his Prep year. As I walked him to his classroom this morning, I held his little hand and could not believe that he is going into Grade 1 next year.   

I have huge respect for the teachers who are passionate about encouraging, teaching and nurturing our children to reach their fullest potential.

My big boy Isaac is going into Grade 4 next year. Yup, Grade 4. 

I had a chat to Isaac's teacher last week and I felt very grateful he was placed into her class this year. 

I am also a little bit sad Mrs C won't be teaching Isaac next year. She has been the most amazing teacher who was committed to giving him the push he needed to grow in confidence, yet being gentle enough to not overwhelm him. 

His marks have improved from last year, and I am 99.99% certain Mrs C was the catalyst.  

Check out this drawing that is currently pinned up on the whiteboard in Isaac's classroom. 

To put it into perspective, the RHS of the vase was blank. The LHS of the vase had the pattern outlined in black. His task was to copy the pattern onto the RHS, and then colour everything in. 

You will have to excuse my proud mummy moment. I just love the striking colour combination he has chosen, and his attention to detail.  

Teachers can have such a massive influence on our children. And the good ones, well...I feel forever in their debt for nurturing and guiding my boys.

Speaking of gratitude for awesome teachers, I made this mini album for Jake's kindy teachers last year as an end of year gift. 

I've shared this mini album before, so here's the link to to the original post (only requires one sheet of 12" x 12" card stock).

Maybe you might like to make a mini album for your children's teachers. Check out the tutorial, the possibilities are endless. 

Thanks for dropping by. Hope you have a fantastic week! xx

ON MY MIND | Proud Moment

When Kellie from Kellie Stamps ran a giveaway to win her Proud Moment wooden stamp, she asked entrants to share their proud moments. 

My recent proud moment was watching my eldest (9) talk to his mate who had come over to hang out. Isaac even made a joke. 

No big deal you might think. Well, it's not. Unless you are a 9 year old with Social Anxiety.

I didn't win the giveaway (darn it! lol), so I ordered my own (and the Love this Moment stamp as well...couldn't help myself)! 

I started thinking about our little journey with Isaac's "shyness".

He is very quiet, reserved, and to find out how he is feeling is not always easy. I often joke that he is one of those moody and mysterious types.

Isaac would speak normally to people he was comfortable with, such as immediate family and other close family members. The minute he was put in a situation with people he was not comfortable with, he would not speak. That's when the sweaty palms and fidgeting started. That was the anxiety kicking in.

When I asked him why he didn't talk to his friends, he simply said "Because I don't want people to hear me." I understood completely because I was EXACTLY the same when I was in primary school. Thankfully, I grew out of it and it looks like Isaac is too.

These past 4 and a bit years has seen tears and frustration from him. Frustration, guilt and helplessness for us parents. 

Isaac completed the BRAVE program run by the University of Qld and Griffith University last year which taught him practical strategies to assist in overcoming his anxiety. 

We have seen amazing changes, such as:

- he uses his words when mates come over; 
- he responds to adults who speak to him without pausing; 
- he participates in conversations with children his own age even if he doesn't know them;
- he talks to his friends at school;
- he is relaxed and can be himself with his mates;
- he openly tells us what is happening at school.

He is never going to be the loudest kid in the class, but hearing him use his words, even if it's quietly is a massive achievement.

I started to wonder if his quietness was affecting his written expression abilities. It's not that he doesn't write well, he's just not that big on detail or adjectives.

I bought him a journal, and at least once a week, I give him a topic to write about. Anything from Skylanders, to Halloween, to why he hates being late for school (happens most mornings).

Although he whinges and complains that it's boring and he would rather be playing games, once he gets into it, he does really well.

I absolutely LOVE reading his journal and most of the time, we read it together. 

My favourite part of reading his entries is the amazing insight into what is going on in his head. It allows me to understand him even more. I love that.

Being aware of his thoughts and feelings, and having the ability to express them in words will be an invaluable life skill for him. Train them young, I say!

This journal is going to be such a treasure. For him and for me.