Saturday, 12 April 2014

ON MY MIND | Bad Day?


Having a bad day? Bad week? Could a different perspective and change of attitude help put new light on a situation? 

What started me thinking about this was when I had a few set backs that were seemingly out of my control over the past few weeks. And then a few more set backs rolled in. And I got a little bit cranky lol...but I wasn't that keen to put it down to just bad luck.  

Let's face it. Sh*t happens. Illness, financial difficulties, grief, disappointment, career challenges, unrequited love....you know what I'm talking about. 

I want to share a little about how my little boys react when they think their entire world is crashing down. And as adults, we react similarly, but in a more grown up way of course!

As an example, my youngest comes to me, stomps his feet with tears welling in those big brown eyes and says "Mummy, today is the worst day ever! It really really is!!" 

I tell him, "Today is not the worst day ever. Today ***insert a 6 year old's idea of disaster here*** happened. Anything happen today that was really really good?"

My little man had just experienced disappointment. Someone or something has built a wall between him and his dream. 

When he comes to me in utter devastation, I ask him:

- do you have mummy and daddy for cuddles?
- do you have food to eat? 
- do you have a house to live in?
- do you have a bed to sleep in?
- do you have toys to play with and books to read?
- are you healthy and well?
- do you have clothes to wear?
- so...is it really that bad?

I do my best to put things into perspective for him and highlight the things he has to be grateful for. More often than not, he snaps out of it quickly. 

When someone or something stands between us and our dreams, or stops us from our ideal way of living or being, it is a normal reaction to blame it on that mysterious thing known as "bad luck". But isn't it disempowering to leave our happiness up to chance?

We have a choice. Every single time. We have the CHOICE to accept a situation and be at peace with it, OR we have the CHOICE to look for ways to change the situation. And sometimes, we need to do both. How awesome to be in control of our own happiness again!?!

My eldest son took a different approach when he was younger. 

He would throw monster tantrums. I'm not talking about "terrible two's" tantrums. These were major 5 year old tantrums. In between tears and screaming, he would say, "Arghhhh! It's all your fault! You made me **insert any of the following: angry...smudge my drawing...break my toy...drop my apple..etc etc**!!!"

Not good, right? We wanted him to learn not to give his power away so easily. What I mean is, when he says it's our fault he is angry, he has given away his ability to control his own emotions to someone else...to us

Not only that, he renounced responsibility for his own actions and feelings i.e. blame.

When we take responsibility for our lives, we reclaim the power to make our lives what we want it to be. We reclaim the power to make dreams into reality. We reclaim the power to be at peace and happy!   

From an outsiders point of view, other people's lives may "appear" better or easier than our own. But what we don't know is the people whom we work with, walk with, wait with, may have just lost a loved one, is fighting for wellness, is desperate to conceive a child, left an abusive relationship, or has just been turned down for yet another job.

We all have our own unique story and our future is yet to be written. We cannot compare hardships. Nor can we compare successes. 

Perhaps the way we perceive a situation, our attitude towards it, and how we choose to react and feel is the key to how much we enjoy the life we have been gifted with. 

Here are two of my favourite quotes that I have made into 3x4 printables, free for you to download. Enjoy. xx

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1 comment:

  1. Thank you for this and thank you for the reminder that I promised myself I was going to be more positive, to be more of a 'half full' kind of girl. Your gratitude/entitlement quote is spot on. We spend so much time thinking we are entitled to the full glass, without being aware that really we should be grateful for the fact that the glass is not empty.

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